Alle verhalen
After 25 years of addiction, several admissions and relapses, I am now truly comfortable in my own skin, I have grown enormously and I have almost no thoughts about using any more. Pherenike was the best choice I ever made — partly thanks to that journey I have found myself again.
I chose a safehouse to get out of my old environment and because I wanted to throw everything at truly recovering, since my use was just a symptom of my real problem.
What has stayed with me most is how much I was able to learn about myself, and that the people I lived with were my teachers in the insights I needed in order to grow. I would absolutely recommend Pherenike to others, because in my experience it has contributed to the stable life I have today. I have genuinely come to love myself and I am a beautiful, loving person who knows who they are and can handle the bumps of life without losing myself.
After more than 30 years of alcohol addiction and 3 attempts, I realised that those 9 or 10 weeks in the clinic were not such a problem — stopping was not that hard for me. The main challenge is the period that follows. That is when the real recovery begins. Carrying on as before was not an option for me; something had to change. To force myself to take that seriously, a safehouse seemed the best solution. I consciously chose a 12-step clinic, and a 12-step safehouse is the logical next step.
When I arrived I was dealing with emotions and circumstances in the way I thought was right — the way I thought was good for me — but in a purely rational manner, and often influenced by what others might think. I was able to make a start on learning to live with myself: taking the time to look at my thoughts, my emotions and the things happening around me, and then changing or accepting them. This is possible because of the safe space provided, the right personal guidance and a good programme. I also found that living together with people from very different backgrounds and characters was an extremely effective environment to reach where I am now. At some point, everyone becomes a kind of family.
Pherenike offers really lovely homes, and not unimportantly, every single one of them is a star — people with a heart for their work, a heart for the residents, people with a real HEART.
I have been in recovery since 2 January 2020 — that is now 1 year, 4 months and 17 days. I started drinking at 14 and by 18 it had become problematic; alongside the alcohol I also started using cocaine.
The choice of a safehouse was simply to get out of my old environment. It was quickly clear it was the right call: I had no home, staying with my family wasn't an option, and I really needed to live with people who had been through the same and were also in recovery.
In het begin moest ik enorm wennen aan de nieuwe situatie, maar ik voelde mij al snel echt thuis bij Pherenike. Toen ik binnenkwam was ik al 5 maanden clean. Ik wilde mijn leven zo snel mogelijk oppakken en dus gelijk beginnen aan het herstellen van relaties, financiën, structuur, werk en op mijzelf kunnen bouwen. Ik ben hier goed bij geholpen, ik heb de juiste handvatten gekregen om mijn doelen te bereiken. Die doelen had ik van tevoren opgesteld om er bij Pherenike aan te werken en had ik echt nodig om het vol te houden. Ik vond het heel fijn en het voelde als een veilige plek waar ik kon verblijven, maar ik was ook blij om in de weekenden naar huis te kunnen gaan om mijn vriendin en familie te zien. Het was daarna ook weer fijn om terug te zijn bij Pherenike. Het voornaamste wat ik hier heb geleerd is om me uit te spreken als ik ergens tegenaanloop en naar m'n gevoel te luisteren. En ook zeker de structuur, financiën, huishouden, zelfzorg en eerlijk durven te zijn.
After living at Pherenike for 11 months, I have had my own rented home since 1 February near my old neighbourhood and I work at a bakery on the street — I really enjoy it. Mentally and physically I am doing very well. I have a positive outlook on life and I am genuinely excited to make something of it.
I look back on a loving time at Pherenike where I was accepted exactly as I am. They gave me their full attention and I was truly listened to. Such wonderful, kind people work and live there. I often think back to the cosy dinners together, the cake moments, the daily openings and the one-on-one conversations with Dirk or with others. And not forgetting the fun moments in the office, popping in for a chat and a laugh. I could be completely myself — such a lovely feeling.